The postings of the last few days started off as an exercise at a writers' group meeting. The title was 'The Milestones Of Life'.
I didn't know what to do with it so I thought I'd just put it on here for a bit of fun.
So, to answer Jarmara's questions:
No. It wasn't a dream. Just a bit of (creative?) writing.
My plumbing is in excellent working order now. Thanks to Nottingham City Hospital.