Sunday, 30 October 2011

Crikey!

I read in the news the other day that, because of the popularity of text speak, traditional British words are dying out. So I think it's the duty of all of us to reverse this trend and start to introduce some of this vocabulary back into our work. This is my attempt and I expect you all to follow my example. See if you can guess which are the words in danger of dying out before clicking on the link above. Not sure I've used some of them correctly.

“Cripes!” exclaimed Dickens as he threw down his newspaper in disgust. “What bally awful news.”
“What is it?” enquired Darwin. “What malaise is troubling your mind? Has the tomfoolery of the rambunctious masses exploded into civil unrest?”
“Verily, if that were all that is wrong,” replied the renowned raconteur. “See for yourself.”
As the famous scientist picked up the sheet, the door opened and in walked their friend.
“Salutations!” declared Gladstone on entering the room. “And felicitations on your latest novel Mr Dickens. Rather a spiffing yarn I thought. I understand it has been lauded across the land.”
“Load of balderdash if you ask me,” said Darwin.
“Don't be such a cad,” said the novelist. “If I were a fighting man I would smite you down and quash those unkind sentiments of yours.”
“A woman is jilted by her betrothed and remains shut away wearing her wedding dress for the rest of her life? And that Pip seemed a laggardly fellow to me. Betwixt the two of them, I don't know which character was the most unbelievable. Unless I am lacking in some arcane knowledge.”
“For a naturalist you are unnaturally rude,” said Gladstone. “I thought it was a swell piece of fiction.”

5 comments:

  1. I don't think it would be possible to follow that, Keith - brilliant! And there are several words there I don't think are ready to be killed off!

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  2. Verily, thou hast spoken wisely, Lady Ashby.

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  3. Lordy me, I rue the day when we are thus curtailed in the exuberance of our verbosity.

    (oh dear, I said 'rue' - does that mean you'll turn French again?)

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  4. Often when I've used a word such as 'gosh', 'horrid' or 'crikey' people tell me, "no one uses that these days". Well yes they jolly well do.

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